<quote from Real Faith & Reason, vol 2>
The Great Cookie Mystery and CSI
Detective Nodacloo rushed into the main lobby of the hotel and saw the large tray of cookies on the glass-topped coffee table next to the green potted ficus tree. “Aha! I’ll solve this mystery, he said loudly, running around and then throwing himself on the floor to look under the couch. “I’m an expert at crime scene investigations, and I have every confidence that science will provide the answer.” Detective Nodacloo was a tall man with darting eyes, wearing the typical CSI uniform, constantly pulling out a small notepad and writing on it with a gold-plated pen that he kept in his shirt pocket.
Justin Thyme was watching all this activity. He had a feeling that Cookie Baker made the cookies, though he didn’t know exactly how Cookie made them or got them to the table.
Detective Nodacloo suddenly shouted, “I’ve solved the great cookie mystery. I know where they came from. It’s simple. Since only Nat Causes can do anything, Nat Causes must have created the cookies.”
Justin said quietly, “I always thought Cookie Baker made cookies.”
Detective Nodacloo jumped up and shouted, “How naïve of you! That’s like saying Santa Clause brought the cookies.” The lobby shook as Nodacloo stamped his foot.
Cowering and whimpering under his breath, Justin said, “But Nat Causes doesn’t have any of the ingredients for making cookies.”
“It’s obvious,” Nodacloo said as he pulled out his magnifying glass and camera, snapping pictures in fast succession. “I follow the evidence, and only Nat Causes could have possibly baked the cookies.”
“But Nat Causes can’t bake,” said Justin.
Nodacloo stood to his full height and glared at Justin. “Of course Nat Causes can bake. He baked these cookies, didn’t he? How else could we explain these cookies? The evidence speaks for itself. Not a single crime scene investigator disagrees.”
Bang! Bang! Bang!
Justin jumped. “What was that?”
“Nothing! You heard nothing,” said Nodacloo
“There it is again,” said Justin. “It’s coming from the closet.”
Justin jumped toward the closet door, but Detective Nodacloo blocked him before he could get there.
Bang! Bang! Bang!
By superhuman effort, Justin wiggled past Nodacloo and opened the closet door. “It’s Detective Cy Intist,” said Justin as he stared at a gagged Cy Intist with his knees in his chest tied up on the floor of the closet with coats hanging in his face. Justin pulled the gag out of Cy’s mouth and started to untie him. “Who tied you up and gagged you this way?”
“I don’t know,” replied Cy. “I was working on the cookie case, trying to find out how those cookies got on the table. I interviewed Cookie Baker and came back here when someone grabbed me from behind, tied me up, and threw me in the closet. It happened so fast that I didn’t have a chance to see who did it.”
As Justin worked to untie Cy, Nodacloo seemed to be working against him, accidentally stepping on his fingers, falling into him, and ridiculing him. Finally, Justin untied the last knot and Cy was free.
“I’m so glad you let me out of the closet. It was terrible listening to Nodacloo making all these claims when I have some more information,” said Cy, dusting off his pants and coat. “I think I picked up a few dust bunnies from the closet floor.”
“What do you mean by more information? You don’t have any information. I have science and evidence. All you have is belief,” Nodacloo said as he tried to push Cy backward.
“Don’t be silly. We both have the same observations, and we can both do the same experiments,” said Cy, expertly dodging Nodacloo’s attack.
“But what can you predict? My predictions prove that Nat Causes made the cookies and put them on the table. For instance, if Nat Causes made the cookies, I would predict footprints, and I have observed footprints,” said Nodacloo. He was now standing arms crossed, as if in judgment, with a severe scowl and one eyebrow raised.
“Those footprints could be from Nat Causes or Cookie Baker. That doesn’t prove anything.”
“Oh yes, it does. You don’t know how science works. You aren’t a real crime scene investigator.”
“What makes you think I’m not a real crime scene investigator?”
“You don’t believe that Nat Causes baked the cookies, and all crime scene investigators believe that Nat Causes baked the Cookies. Therefore, you aren’t a real crime scene investigator. Simple logic!”
“That’s ridiculous,” said Cy. “I’ve talked to Cookie Baker, and he says that he baked the cookies and put them on the table. Did you interview Cookie Baker, Detective Nodacloo?”
“No need to. I don’t believe Cookie Baker exists. I tried to call him once and didn’t get an answer. Therefore, he’s just a figment of your imagination.”
Justin kept looking from one to the other not knowing who to believe. He wondered if this confusion is what science is all about.
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